Being the Presence of Jesus
May 22, 2009
I’ve been reading God in the Alley by Greg Paul. It has really been messing with my heart and head. Early in the book he tells Neil’s Story. Neil has AIDS. Greg, the author of the book tells how he signed up to be a “buddy and gofer” for Neil. Over time the relationship moves from being cold and formal to being warm and genuine. In short, they become friends. Then one morning Greg stops by to visit Neil. As he enters the hot and humid room he discovers Neil “writhing in a soundless panic, half sitting up, his pajama bottoms and the bed sheets wound around his ankles, his spindly arms flailing in a futile effort to free himself, a look of sheer terror on his face. He had soiled himself, and it was everywhere. He was disoriented, uncertain where he was or what was happening to him.”
Once Greg is able to free Neil from the tangled mess, he begins to calm down. Greg then carries Neil to the tub. While Neil soaks Greg proceeds to change the soiled sheets before coming back to dress Neil in clean pajamas and carry him back to his bed. Greg comments, “He seemed almost weightless, just bones shrink-wrapped with grayish skin. His temples were hollow, and his teeth seemed too large for his face.”
As Greg begins to tuck Neils feet into the bed, he notices that one of Neils feet was not completely clean. Greg grabs a wash cloth and begins to wipe that foot. In his own word’s Greg describes what happens next, “As I did so, I was struck by what I can only describe as a powerful revelation, two streams of thought converging, and both seeming to me to be the voice of God. Cradling his foot in my hands, my mind was filed with the image of Jesus washing the feet of his disciples at the Last Supper, a towel around his waist, determinedly taking the servant’s role. I had been meditating on the story from John’s gospel just the day before, and now I could almost see Jesus hunched over Peter’s foot, his hair hanging forward and obscuring his face, quietly insisting against Peter’s protestations that those feet, but only the feet, needed to be washed. This moment was what my whole time with Neil had been for! This was what it meant to be the presence of Christ. I had been looking for opportunities to preach, wanting to effect a clear and possibly dramatic conversion. I realized in that moment that my longing for those things was as much or more an indication of my desire to be successful as they were of my passion for Neils’ soul. It became clear that, being Jesus to Neil, while it certainly included praying for him, and announcing the good news to him, was most perfectly summed up by the mundane and even odious task of gently wiping excrement from his foot.”
Comments
3 Comments to “Being the Presence of Jesus”
Got something to say?
-
Subscribe To MO
Thank you, that was most moving.
Jamie, thanks for the post. I would like to hear more about this book sometime.
Sounds like Jesus is present and where he belongs and feels right at home. May Greg’s tribe increase.